Greetings my Dayak folks! While the Batang Ai folks waiting anxiously the RM70m projects promised by BN, let us recall back some of the projects which is the proposed internet facilities project as announced by PRS Julau MP YB Joseph Salang. Right, YB Joseph Salang insisted that those projects are not merely election gimmick but a mere coincidence, but think of it as the gimmick of coincidence. Everything seems to be happened by divine intersection, whatever it may be. Put it this way. What else the rural folks ask? Internet? 3GX? Wifi? Wimax? To read more Malaysia Today, Mkini, DayakBaru and blew their mind off that they are nothing more than BN slaves all these while? That all the money being milked by their own Dayak leaders?  The concept of respecting ‘perintah BN’ still valid regardless of right or wrong? All of these basically beyond the promise to bring development be it just a coincidence or election gimmick. This is a plain insult to the rural folks and this insult brought by the Dayak leader himself. Internet inside the jungle? How about live webcam on cockfight gambling huh? No, download the latest technique on liquor distillation so as to produce the best Tuak Rice Tequilla ever. Or get the Dayak rural folks realise how hideously myopic-thinking is that ever-hideous looking Lubok Antu MP YB Willy ‘Ol Badak abusing MRP grants as his personal show-time, while in fact MRP grants shouldn’t be treated that way for show and grandeur. It is a tiny sum of duit rakyat that being robbed much earlier but BN as the robber suddenly become great donor philanthropist returning the small portion of the robbed money back to the victim.

While it’s clearly a joke for YB Joe to call it coincidence rather than gimmick, just read the following but treat it as a joke as well. Shall we:

A TMNet technician went to a longhouse Rumah TR Jangan, Batang Ai for installation on some internet and phone line connection, after the announcement of Dayak minister Joe Salang of some funds availability for that purpose. It’s already late evening when they arrived there but the longhouse chief still went out for hunting.

Tmnet: Maaf encik, mana encik tuai rumah?
Folk: Oh, Jangan cakap, dia pergi cari babi hutan dekat kebun sana.

Tmnet: Eh, bukan. Kami datang mau check ini tempat mau pasang line telefon sama internet.
Folk: Jangan cakap, kamu orang mau pasang, pasang saja.

Tmnet: Kami boleh pasang, tapi ini semua mau kena bayar caj servis sikit lah. Nanti siapa mau bayar?
Folk: Oh itu semua Jangan bayar.

Tmnet: Eh, mestilah bayar. Siapa cakap ini semua kasi free?
Folk: Jangan cakap bayar…pasang kasi free ini semua rumah panjang.

Tmnet: Tapi tidak ada arahan mau kasi semua free. Komputer untuk internet pun kita sendiri mau beli. Siapa yang pandai-pandai cakap?
Folk: Jangan lah cakap.

Tmnet: Kenapalah jangan cakap? Menteri suruh kami datang pasang kerana subsidi untuk telefon/internet sudah ada tapi servis caj pasang wayar semua mau kena bayar. Tak banyak sikit saja.
Folk: Saya sudah cakap…itu semua Jangan lah bayar.

Tmnet: Kalau kamu cakap jangan bayar, tidak ada line nanti sebab tidak ada wayar. Kami pun mau kena bayar servis caj, mana boleh servis free.
Folk: Kalau Jangan bayar servis caj semua, kami yang lain mesti ada line telefon line internet. Bayar bulan-bulan sama beli komputer kami lah yang sendiri bayar tapi servis caj mau pasang semua rumah panjang Jangan lah bayar. Itu yang dia beritahu kami sini dulu.

Tmnet: Siapa yang cakap macam itu?!
Folk: Jangan lah cakap!

Tmnet: Sabar encik, sabar. Kami datang mesti lah pasang wayar dulu. Ini semua servis caj. Tapi ini bukan free, mau kena bayar juga. Yang kira free itu mungkin sikit-sikit subsidi dari Menteri kelak lah. Faham tidak..?
Folk: Saya faham. Tapi itu semua ini wayar-wayar punya caj Jangan lah bayar dulu sepatutnya.

Tmnet: Ok lah macam ini saja, kita tunggu tuai rumah balik dulu baru kita settle ini semua. (Susah betul lah ini orang)
Folk: Ya lah, tunggu saja, Jangan balik dulu. (Paloi magang sikok kaban tok…ada kah jako bekenyak ngasuoh kitai tok bayar empu)

Folk: Ha, itu dia Tuai Rumah Jangan sudah balik.
Tmnet: Hah, Tuai Rumah Jangan?
Folk: Iya lah, nama dia Jangan. Ini rumah panjang dia lah tuai rumah nya.
Tmnet: Patutlah kamu selalu cakap ‘Jangan’ saja. Heh heh.

TR Jangan: Kita dari Telekom kah? Sudah siap pasang semua kah?
Tmnet: Belum, saya baru datang. Saya cuma mau tahu siapa bayar servis caj semua nanti.
TR Jangan: Oh itu semua saya bayar nanti. Anang takut.
Folk: Saya sudah cakap, Jangan bayar… 😀
Tmnet: Oh! OK OK!